Category: Jokes

He’s got a ‘roving eye’
You mean he looks at other women?
No, one of his eyes goes like this 👈

The circus ringmaster asks the applicant what he can do.

Without a word, the man flaps his arms, flies to the top of the tent, swoops through the trapeze, and soars around the high wire. Finally, he comes to a perfect landing next to the ringmaster. 

The ringmaster says “We already have a bird impressionist.”

What do you call a fly without wings?
  A walk

Through the ajar bedroom door, three children spy their parents in the throes of passion. Quietly they retreat a few steps, and confer in whispers.

The youngest speaks out first, “Maybe they’re sick.”

“Naw,” says the second youngest, “looks like they’re ‘rasslin’.”

“You’re both wrong,” states the eldest, smug in his knowledge, “they’re makin’ babies.”

There is a pause.

“Working hard to keep the hospitals stocked,” deduces the second youngest.

Confused, the youngest says, “I thought Dad was a banker.”

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The moral of the story is — make sure you lock the door when you have sex.

I don’t think this is a true story, so I’ve created a new category called ‘Jokes’. (But this might be my only one…)

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When I was younger, I had to walk very far to school every day. There was a teacher at the school with the name Williams. She was very pretty, and well-endowed. One day, I was at my desk looking at her and not listening, when I realized that she had asked me a question. Everyone was waiting. Knowing that it was math class, I answered with the first thing that I thought of — “parabolas.” I was then taken to the principal. I was told later that the question she had asked was “What are you looking at?”