“Bull!” [Classic] (675 word story)

The stillness of the cool evening air and the soft whirring of the night insects did little to betray the terrible battle that ensued deep within the stony bowels of the mighty Labyrinth. In a dimly-lit chamber, a brawny Athenian youth was locked in mortal combat with the creature known as the Minotaur — the accursed son of Pasiphae, wife of Minos.

Themus, son of Labdacus, grandson of Poseidon drew forth his dagger from his belt as he and the Minotaur wrestled powerfully on the grimy floor, muscles stretching and sinews cracking. Both mighty opponents were bathed in sweat, and neither had the upper hand, until a powerful but awkward thrust of the dagger by Themus embedded the blade in the Minotaur’s left eye. The two drew apart — each quietly thankful for the brief respite from the fray.

Themus eyed his foe. Aside from the grossly disfigured head and the terrible, inhuman strength, the Minotaur was completely human in every respect. The gleam of intelligence that shown from its remaining eye made Themus pause, but the glimpse of the scattered bones along the chamber walls rekindled the fury in him, spurring him on with his sworn task: the destruction of this hell-spawned behemoth.

Due to the abnormal thickness of the monster‘s skull, the hurried knife thrust had not penetrated to the brain, but it had cost the creature the sight in one eye and a great deal of blood — though no signs of weakness were yet apparent. Themus attributed his lack of injuries to his quickness and to the oddly-defensive fighting style of the Minotaur.

He lunged toward the beast, attempting to bring it down and pound the dagger in the remaining inches needed to end this wretched creature’s life. The Minotaur easily sidestepped the lad and caught him from behind, its iron grip around his thick neck cutting off the blood to his brain. Themus’ mighty struggles became feebler as the world spun about him and blackness prevailed.

Sometime later, he stirred groggily to the realization that he was being dragged by his ankles down black, winding corridors through which the Minotaur’s rasping breath echoed ominously. Themus kept his own breathing even as he surveyed his surroundings through slitted eyes. He could dimly see the outline of the beast silhouetted against a slowly-increasing light far ahead — undoubtedly some chamber in which he would be devoured, Themus reasoned. He vowed not to give the creature a chance.

He was dragged past numerous intersecting corridors that darted off into deeper blackness. Gripping a corner as he was passing, Themus jerked his feet free and rolled to a standing position before the Minotaur was aware of what had occurred.

The Minotaur turned slowly, finally showing the effect of the loss of blood, but Themus was already upon it, bringing it down and pinning it to the cold floor. The monster looked up sadly, but did not struggle as Themus unhesitantly pounded the dagger the remaining inches, ending the beast’s wretched life. The world went dark once more.

Themus awoke confused amid a rush of memories as he tried to piece together the events of the last few hours. He looked at the still form next to him, noticing the dagger in the eye of the fine, regular, human features — peaceful in death — and was only dimly surprised when his own hand raised to his throbbing head encountered hairy, unfamiliar features.

He saw his battle with the Minotaur in a new light, only now realizing that the poor creature had been trying to prevent this terrible transformation.

He reached for his knife with intent to end his life but some force within him stayed his hand as his mind echoed with distant, hollow laughter. Cursing Zeus and resigning himself to his new fate, Themus began dragging the body in the opposite direction — away from the exit toward which the former Minotaur had been trying to take him.

His mouth salivated unconsciously as he brought home his meal.

The Collector [Classic] (250 word story)

Here’s another (silly) one from my deep dark (early) youth. I may need to start carbon dating the paper to identify the year in which my stories were written…

More old stories here.


The Collector flitted invisibly from deep shadow to shadow. His stealthy movements did little to disturb the other dark inhabitants of this nether region. He paused to consider his mission entrusted to him a few short moments ago by the evil Dark Master, The Collector knew that the Dark Master drove his servants harder than was necessary, but the Collector had known no other existence. He had been taught by the Dark Master to carry out the never-ending battle against the Horrible Filth that regularly invaded the Dark Master’s domain.

He continued haltingly done the narrow lane of fate, knowing that there would be no turning back until he fulfilled his dark destiny and, only then, could he return to the Dark Master waiting for him in the rover. At last, his goal was in sight. He pressed against a wall — retreating into the black recesses — keeping a darting eye out for any intruders.

There! He caught a glimpse of a Silent One, a clear minion of the opposing force. The Silent One turned toward him. He knows! The Collector knew what must be done to protect his mission. He moved toward the Silent One…

The Collector was halted by a voice. Some message from the Dark Master:

“What the fuck are you doing? Leave that rat alone and get the garbage, will ya?”

The Collector grabbed the trashcans and moved steadily back up the alley.

Suicide [Classic] (600 word story)

No one dies this time — but not through lack of trying.

Side note: I used an online character recognition site to ‘read’ a scan of my old typewritten story and convert it to digital text. I had to make a boatload of edits to correct things so, at the end of the day, I’m not sure it saved me time over retyping the whole thing. Maybe…

More old stories here.


The man seated at the large walnut desk in the air-conditioned office glanced apprehensively at his wristwatch as he had done dozens of times within the last hour. It was five minutes to ten — time to begin. He called for his private secretary who came promptly into the office.

”Would you please get me a cup of coffee?” he asked, knowing that it would take her between three and a half and four minutes to return with the cup.

“Certainly,” she told him with a smile, and he watched her, as prim and neat as ever, as she closed the door behind her. He reached into his desk drawer and brought out an envelope which he set in the middle of the otherwise vacant blotter, rose from his padded chair, and stepped toward the large window overlooking Wall Street and the bustling people far below.

The previous day, his wife has brought up the subject of divorce along with the shocking news that she was having an affair. He knew most of the blame was his, for he had not been much of a husband in recent years, being too concerned with his job — which he had ironically come to despise with all his heart. This new situation with his wife was the proverbial last straw that caused him to decide to end his life today. At ten o’clock his wife was supposed to call about the divorce, but he planned on not being here at that time. The coffee was so that all would know the exact time of his death.

He opened the window wide and stepped out onto the ledge as the cold autumn wind tore at his hair and clothes. Thirty-five stories below him, tiny cars and specks of people inched their way along the narrow street. He pictured himself, sprawled on the pavement, a brighter speck amid the crowd.

He leaned forward, preparing to jump, when fear gripped him. The idea of suicide that had seemed so desirable a moment ago, now repulsed him. He realized that he still did love his wife — and that an apology and a reformed life might yet win her back. He also realized that he did not really dislike his job, and that the thought of living seemed much sweeter than the blackness of death.

But he was already off balance. He was on the very edge, pin-wheeling his arms in a losing battle to regain his balance and not plummet to the street, hundreds of feet below. Sweat rolled down his face and bile rose to his throat as he tipped that last centimeter.

Suddenly, a gust of icy wind caught him and seemed to set him back upon the ledge like a giant hand. His heart was pounding wildly as he pressed himself to the brick, his eyes closed in thankfulness.

He cautiously sidled toward the window, backed in, but did not feel safe until, with trembling hands, he closed the window tightly. He made his way shakily to his desk, absently fixing his hair and straightening his tie. As he fell back into his chair, his secretary, prim and neat as ever, came into the door carrying the cup of coffee that he had asked for — seeming ages ago.

She set it on his desk and, looking toward his suicide note, asked if he would like her to mail it.

“No,” he smiled, sliding the envelope into his jacket pocket.

”Your wife is on the line,” she informed him.

”Thank you, that will be all.” he said truthfully. He smiled as he reached for the telephone.

Word play [Classic] (three 4-line poems)

Below are three ‘palindrome poems’ — that read front to back, then back to front. I chose these three from a set of seven that I wrote since these are the best: they (sort of) make logical and grammatical sense. Believe me, the other four are worse…

Essentially, to write one of these, you need two pairs of rhyming words that can be both nouns and verbs. Doesn’t sound that difficult, but perhaps it is/was. Someday, I’ll try again.


Take the gun
Fake the run
Run the fake
Gun the take

Break the foot
Snake the root
Root the snake
Foot the brake

Pop up stick
Cop the trick
Trick the cop
Stick up Pop

Death All Around Me

I’m a little disturbed — that I’m a little disturbed.

Looking back over my posts — stories and poems — I find that fully half of them include a death, mostly murders. Plus there are contemplations of suicide, and other tragedies like heart attacks, etc.

Am I that horrible of a person? Maybe…

Someday, some terrible crime will happen near me, and investigators will read what I’ve written and convince themselves that I must have been the perpetrator — because my writings are so dark.

Longtree [Classic] (13 line poem)

An old poem that I thought was unfinished, but I’ve recently decided it was.

Weep for the children of Longtree
Their dreams are shattered
Their hopes are shorn
No home have they to lay their heads

Weep for the children of Longtree
For in the night
As they did sleep
Death saw fit to show his head

Weep for the children of Longtree
They think they live
They know not life
Condemned to dwell among the dead

Weep for the children of Longtrtee

An Elephant [Classic] (700 word story)

Sad, another tragic death. Remember: my ‘classic’ stories were written when I was young and silly. More old stories here.


The carnival was bustling with the noise of the early-evening throng. The oppressive heat seemed to make the whole scene appear unreal as if in a dream or an old painting about to wear through – revealing the blank wall underneath.

Every night it was the same. Except tonight the freak show was receiving unusual attention partially due to the excellent hawking of Bob Edwards, and partially due to some new attractions that had not yet been seen in this town.

Actually, the crowd-drawing attractions – the tattooed lady, the elephant boy, the bearded lady, a family of midgets (not actually related) – had been with the carnival for years, but were only seen along this seldom-used northern route during exceptionally hot summers such as this one.


Joshua, the elephant boy, hated crowds – especially this one. There were no familiar faces, and they didn’t seem to treat him with the awe and respect that he received along their traditional route. He studied the faces anyway, catching what names he could, and storing them away for when they would next travel this route.

Joshua had an extraordinary memory. He knew by heart the names and layouts of all the cities along the carnival’s summer and winter runs. He could recognize all the faces he had seen and put names to those whose names he had heard in previous years. He remembered events as far back in his childhood with the circus as could be verified, and could tell you what shows were the best draws in any given city. The manager of the carnival, T. Farmer, had been meaning to work up an act using Joshua’s fantastic memory, but had never gotten around to it.

For that, Joshua was glad. The less attention he got, the better. He was content to lead his simple life and think about the woman that he saw in his dreams and assumed to be his mother. In his dreams she would come to him, take him in her arms and say she was sorry for leaving him, and the two would live happily ever after.

She had probably left him for some good reason, Joshua thought, and all would be well when she found him again. His dangling nose between his far-set eyes would crinkle up in excitement when he thought of the new, normal life he would then lead. And this might even be the night because the occasional glimpses of the town had convinced him that he had been here before as an infant. So he kept searching for that very special face in the crowd.

As the evening wore on, the crowd began thinning and Joshua had nearly given up, when … there she was!

She seemed to have aged more than Joshua’s fifteen years, and was much smaller than he remembered, even smaller than he was now. Speechless, he had reached out his hand for his mother as she passed, but she shrank back with a look of recognition and horror in her eyes, and had hurried out of the tent.

Joshua was momentarily paralyzed as tears came to his eyes. It all came back to him in a rush – how she had discarded him, not caring if he lived or died, in an abandoned lot when the carnival was in town. And also how Mr. Big, the midget, had found him lying there half dead. Joshua shook his head to clear it of its stupor, and dashed out of the back of the tent. Mother!

Joshua searched frantically for her and caught a glimpse of her receding form hurrying between two tents toward the back of the lot. As he ran after her, he noticed he had a tent stake in his hand. He reached her and brought the stake crashing down upon her head.

They found Joshua an hour later rocking back and forth, cradling the bloody head of his mother’s body in his lap, and repeating almost apologetically over and over again with tears once again in his eyes: “Elephants never forget, Mom, elephants never forget…”

Foreknowledge [Classic] (650 word story)

I submitted this story for a creative writing class in college — and got a bad grade on it. At the time, I was taking an insanely large class load (so big that I needed the dean’s personal approval to do so), which was a bad idea, and was just submitting stories I had previously written — both good and bad. The instructor said the story lacked a ‘middle’.


Imagine knowing that the exact moment of your death was in the future; to know that whatever you do today: skydive without a parachute, cross the street against traffic, drink a bottle of poison, you would not die at that moment, but rather at some future time.

How would you live your life? Would you wrestle alligators? Join a street gang? Become a racecar driver? A test pilot? A lion tamer? A mercenary? All of these?


“You will answer any question that I ask?”

“For the price of my freedom into the world, yes.”

Sean studied the figure in the pentagram. It was about eighteen inches tall and glowed a dim red. It had the head of a goat and the lower half of its body looked like the rear end of a goat, but the arms, protruding belly, and disproportionately large penis were human. It smelled of caves and soot.

Sean had spent the entire day collecting the materials for the conjuration. He had been to half a dozen hard-to-find shops, and several individuals, obtaining various animal parts and herbs as well as texts on the black arts. All were very expensive but, he believed, well worth it. He had brought the materials back to the abandoned house he had located and spent another hour setting up. The actual conjuration had taken less than ten minutes, and now he was confronted by a lesser demon with a nearly-unpronounceable name.

“Granted,” Sean agreed, “that is, if you allow me to bind you to honesty so that I can be assured of your truthfulness, and if you answer two questions and not one.” A demon could not be bound unless it gave permission.

“Agreed.”

Sean cast the required spell. The demon was now obligated to answer his two questions fully and truthfully, though Sean secretly intended not to keep his end of the bargain.

“My first question is this: When am I going to die?”

“Simple enough,” the demon remarked, “You shall die next year on April 12 at 4:03 PM.”

So soon? No matter.

“My second question is this,” Sean continued, “How can I send you back?” The books had not said how to return a demon once it had been summoned.

The demon wailed and gnashed its teeth. Not without many noxious curses, the demon told Sean what he wanted.

Sean began the spell while the demon cried at its lost chance at freedom.


“Sean had a happy life. I had first met him three months ago when we were both travelling through southern France but, from the vivid way in which he described his life, and from our close friendship, I feel that I had come to know the real Sean, and I found him to be a good man, who loved his family.” His mother sobbed at this. I told some more lies about how much he had spoken of home, about how difficult it was to put into words the great deeds of this great man, and how unworthy I was to give his eulogy.

I ended with, “It is almost a blessing that he was taken from this world when he was, because no one should have to suffer in this world for so long when he is just a step away from the rewards of the next.”

Sean’s mother smiled at me as I walked down the aisle of the church toward the doors in the rear. I smiled back as visions of his car accident that had left him in a coma for months flashed through my mind. I never really liked Sean and felt that he had gotten what he deserved, but his family had contacted me – Sean must have mentioned my name in a letter – and asked me to give his eulogy.

I was left alone with my thoughts as I stepped out into the light April rain.

Seance [Classic] (650 word story)

The windowless room was lit only by a dim, flickering radiance from the crystal ball in the center of the table. Probably a candle underneath, though Willie Forbes. Then, as he leaned a little closer and examined it through squinted eye, yep, it’s a candle alright, he decided. He looked about quickly to make sure that no one had seen him misbehave. All eyes were closed, all ears seemed to be straining to follow Madame Rowella’s monotone chant. Willie fought back a yawn. He had only come here to humor his old mother who had gotten it into her head a few days ago that she must contact his father’s spirit.

So Willie had picked a name out of the phonebook and arranged a seance for an outrageous sum of money. He hoped that his mother wouldn’t make a habit of this nonsense. The Rowella woman was as ugly as a dog, too. She looked like a witch, he thought, which is probably why she can charge all that money — she looks convincing, right down to the wart on her nose.

Willie couldn’t figure out why his mother would want to get in touch with his father anyway. They had never gotten along — his father hadn’t gotten along with anyone. He used to call Willie’s mother ‘Poopsie’. What a laugh! That old crow look more like Poopsie the Poodle than anything else.

Willie hadn’t gotten along with his father either. In fact, it was Willie who had arranged that little hunting ‘accident’ that had killed his father last fall. Last year at this time they had had a great big funeral. What a waste! They shoulda just dumped that bum in some hole in the backyard. There were a lot of tears, but it was the best thing that had ever happened to his mother and him. That drunk was just wasting away whatever money his mother had managed to save.

At that time, Willie had still considered his mom attractive and had hoped that she’d get remarried to some rich old geezer, but she kinda just withered away to the senile old woman she was today. It was all his father’s fault. Hate built up inside of him just like it had in the days before he had killed his father. Looking at his mother now and thinking about the way her mind had gone, Willie would have wrung that old goat’s neck if he were here today.

Along with the hate came a touch of fear. What if there were something to this seance bit? What if his father’s spirit did come back and told his mother the truth? Naw, all that was for the movies. None of that stuff happens in real life. Besides, his mother would be too senile to understand anyway.

Madame Rowella’s chant had increased in intensity. She said with a chill in her voice: “He is with us now.”

There did seem to be something fluttering about the room, dimming the ghost-light from the crystal ball. Clever, Willie thought, trying to cover his fear. Then suddenly, something gripped his throat.

Mrs. Forbes heard a choking sound from her son. “What’s wrong, Willie?” she asked with concern in her voice.

A pause.

“Nothing, Mom.” Willie’s voice said in the darkness.

“Shhh.” warned Madame Rowella, but the rest of the evening went without incident.


“I’m sorry, Mrs. Forbes. I thought I had contact there for a moment, but then — nothing.”

“It’s quite alright, Madame Rowella. I’m sure you did your best. I had felt the need to summon my husband, but now that need has passed.”

“I won’t feel right unless you allow me to refund your money. I…”

“No, I wouldn’t think of it. Now I really must be going.”

Willie got her coat. “Yes, come along, Poopsie.” and, arm in arm, they walked to the car.

A Day in the Life of Brown The Clown [Classic] (49 line poem)

Finally, Brown makes an entrance. This poem grew from the challenge of two constraints: finding rhymes of vowel-n (-ane, -een, -ine, -own, etc.) and mapping verses to three-hour blocks of time to fill the day. I went as far as to illustrate this whole poem using basic shapes in MS Paint for Windows, then injecting noise to pixilate the result. Having problems finding a copy…

Hey! I found a copy! Look here. Hard to believe that was 10 years ago.


My name is Brown.
I am a clown.
I do my antics upside-down.

And every time I do a show,
I want the people all to know –
My name is Brown;
I am a clown.

I wake at dawn
To mow the lawn
And feed my brother’s favorite fawn.

I cut the grass down in a row;
Then churn it with a garden hoe.
I wake at dawn
To mow the lawn.

From nine to noon,
I sing a tune —
A silly song about the moon.

At times I’m aided by a crow
Who comes along at ten or so.
From nine to noon,
I sing a tune.

By three I’m seen
Out with the Queen,
Who keeps her scepter very clean.

She fills my head with thoughts of woe
By telling me I’m not her beau.
By three I’m seen
Out with the Queen.

Till six I deign
To fly a plane
About the edge of my domain.

I bring the plane down nice and low
Before I yell “Geronimo!”
Till six I deign
To fly a plane.

From six to nine,
It’s time to dine
On figs and capers soaked in brine.

I pay the waiter what I owe,
Then ride home on my buffalo.
From six to nine,
It’s time to dine.

Night finds me prone
And all alone
Upon my comfy bed of stone.

The dreams that through my head do flow
Are of the days that come and go.
Night finds me prone –
And all alone.


Originally, the evening block was this:
‘From six to nine, I’m feeling fine – with several empty jugs of wine.
I ask for more, and answer ‘no’ – but pour another one to go.’
I’ve changed this to make the poem more generally acceptable.

The related change is that I made the waiter look like my dad. He died a couple of years ago, so it’s both memorable and sad to see my representation of him.

2021 NOTE: I’ve been hesitant to move this poem forward (toward publishing) because of the line about Geronimo, and the fear that it is somehow demeaning and/or isn’t politically correct. Searching online now indicates that the US military shouts this when jumping from airplanes as an homage to Geronimo’s brave reputation. This makes me feel OK about using it.

2025 NOTE: My eldest printed out this story as a book — and everyone who reads it really likes it. This makes me interested in moving my children poems/stories forward.