{"id":34,"date":"2015-07-16T14:04:12","date_gmt":"2015-07-16T21:04:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/tomswritings.lewczyk.net\/?p=34"},"modified":"2024-08-23T09:50:02","modified_gmt":"2024-08-23T16:50:02","slug":"34","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/lewczyk.net\/tomswritings\/?p=34","title":{"rendered":"The Final Cut [Classic] (12 line poem)"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"color: #000080;\"><em>My son thinks this may be the best thing I&#8217;ve written.<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>She started by sending me letters<br \/>\nHundreds a day without fail<br \/>\nThe postman developed a hernia<br \/>\nSo I had them cut off my mail<\/p>\n<p>Next she&#8217;d call me at noontime<br \/>\nMy ear wore away to the bone<br \/>\nFor hours and hours she&#8217;d ramble and talk<br \/>\nSo I had them cut off my phone<\/p>\n<p>Finally she&#8217;d come to my bedroom<br \/>\nWe&#8217;d have so much sex I&#8217;d get sick<br \/>\nTo dress was a chore (I had gotten so sore)<br \/>\nSo I had them cut off\u2026 the end of this poem<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>My son thinks this may be the best thing I&#8217;ve written. She started by sending me letters Hundreds a day without fail The postman developed a hernia So I had them cut off my mail Next she&#8217;d call me at noontime My ear wore away to the bone For hours and hours she&#8217;d ramble and &hellip; <\/p>\n<p class=\"link-more\"><a href=\"http:\/\/lewczyk.net\/tomswritings\/?p=34\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;The Final Cut [Classic] (12 line poem)&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[22,5,13],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/lewczyk.net\/tomswritings\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/34"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/lewczyk.net\/tomswritings\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/lewczyk.net\/tomswritings\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lewczyk.net\/tomswritings\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lewczyk.net\/tomswritings\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=34"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"http:\/\/lewczyk.net\/tomswritings\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/34\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1775,"href":"http:\/\/lewczyk.net\/tomswritings\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/34\/revisions\/1775"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/lewczyk.net\/tomswritings\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=34"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lewczyk.net\/tomswritings\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=34"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/lewczyk.net\/tomswritings\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=34"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}